CJam, 353 317 302 bytes
I'm using Falko's word list, for fairness, so that the only difference in golfing is due to the languages and not the content (I might change the word list if people start golfing the content as well).
"Computers will never ""buy
cut
dry
eat
fax
get
pay
rob
see
sue
tax
tow
wax
win
code-golf
understand"N/[" an octopus"" a ""salad
bag
bar
bee
bow
boy
bra
dad
fax
gym
guy
hat
man
mom
pet"{N/\f{\+}~]}:F~[" after lunch"" naked"" ever"" for ""fun
me
you
us
tip
gas
cash
air
oil
beer
love
food
dope"Fm*m*mr0=