# Goodbye, world! [closed]

Write a program that erases itself. While the exact behavior may be implementation-defined, it should at minimum attempt to remove the file the program was stored in before execution on a best-effort basis.

This is a , so the answer with the most upvotes will win.

# C + Unix

Outputs a Shakespeare soliloquy before deleting itself:

#include <stdio.h>
#include <string.h>
#include <unistd.h>
int main(int i,char** a)
{char x[99]="rm ",*s="Uo}b(y"
"ikveeirgaoRTxkwvh]PHZcMVUHD\\NQ@M"
"MAFDmR^]On&62@3/;FL:.7A00\"+#/:$(7,}y3!z~" "s.#{+}~nmkwDWjf~rjfjbmwYeZsUedgbl\\RiY^\\YG" "LIRWT^EMOPPH>v&HSHBPE1:3K-=7<F(-&-155>~<0!z8(|5" "*'#(r{s\"8KKwl'h~$rrqorgkcy_g\\uj]Y1o{zlA[iNRMqd"
"poaVP^RJBAKdWcbTs\"BP>?A3fJ,8-F)?C%A5-%$.;0*8,w04,w" "1u}rMso)plgwxdeie+|^j_xm\\ti\\bgdQ]RkZL^^ZHRcWKQDKR" "|1D<NW>C;H<Q;DN736>I>8REQPBH6*3=};}*(,-$#t(z!}NQq#y~|s!"
"%xr\"ce}ufoc!]&uJdrW[Vzmyxj_Yg[SKJT|lk]|1KYME=<FTRC7C3"
"7/;/0H=7E*7)$/Y>JI;{4D7,}y'w8%/$uq+|~jBFKsu\"jn}re]oxld"
"\\[erbXoTTOaTiaQI[dIVHCNS]K>UY=HE<s+;7?NF3K4,@.F:.:*).&"
"$=-#\"9.!!*4\"#%&pz-ozsu4GSzww\"hiuc{qnxiYliZ.qfYUaSr_i^" "QMeXJWSGDT}2E=OXF9B;HR63=1<7AEI9/F:5C020(>+'#!TX]')4,z\"" "0(}$xo*kmhx%xkg!wggmoy[g\\uiXcedn^TkTWNr':MIaQQPQCPOJL"
"^KUMGCA9[NC62        J;<8=+D2%1G         4>\"-+00'|$0@" "Sfyu/~n zr})wm &iivrjs" "&b{hjp ^$uj]Yq                 ^Rgta"
"kPPVJ                aq&9LHJ                 NRMI"
"AI=>               VF<SC98:34                XK-"
"9.G             </+C7373.2\\o              $z." "7(v *|w!&/{r ~t~)wm&y lh\"" "vnvmo pcswlXaZg} 2HXT\\kTP hQQTYJPI" "NIFFQZCCLVHK>9GGDN</81 i!2</D&B%#3%=~,~&#'U5-" "{#1)~%yp+~qmzk%jdtee kq{^[k$7JdrZdf^clNZ"
"Oh\\_LGYbXPEEQ\\>Z         R?:JPTA=97[noCAJ?2"
"*<E  :-)A&3%~\"         ;+!8,'$y) zz~" "v.nr!o{( kkfxk.!-" ",|=Pc_wmeZ^gVagUasQjNY" "^V[X^naHSOL\\TDJM>V9E" "JFAp} ?MB?-A/54,8C6(662-1G:FE 7(,0/" "~v%/$uq+#                rts2EEqf!miboyolviW               i\\XdoRTO_"
"j_RX[LdNPOU_WD                                            \\E=Q?w,?7CR9>JNC"
"=K;?2.::D9,$6?7$<(*                                  *17&v+zz'0~tLL_r~{'"
"itrvejemabz_i^                       kucV_XpT_fO_P^hX"
"Ne[XbDNMy}}K@           YNAMJTI<8P?1C7"
"C1I2>-E5+B5'4/+31%*(W_*4({"
"t{{wrp+y0my&|mwj!tgc"
"{l\\f^vZWhhqaWncV\\aR"
"R]#''SHaGOTDPMN     DM>KUE;R:D61CL="
"5?-1F(4)B01.%-2G               Zp#-~5*{{&0#stm}n5("
"{njmu\"duqpbjomwllhcrTi                     ciy..ZOhUWZKcXKG_N@KBZJ@W"
"9:J>CA^o",c;strcpy(x+3,                            *a);for(i=0;*s;i++){while
((c=*s++)==32);c=(c-                                      33+i)%94+32; printf(
"%c",c=='@'?(sleep(                                         3),'\n'):c);}printf
("\n");system                                            (x);sleep
(6);return                                                c-c;}


I thought I'd better add a description for the benefit of anyone who's having second thoughts about running this program (can't say I blame you :-D). It consists almost entirely of a single text string

*s="Uo}b(yikveeirgaoRT ... G_N@KBZJ@W9:J>CA^o"; /* 1459 bytes */


which is decoded in a for() loop with an incrementing counter i. After stepping past any white space (while ((c=*s++)==32);), the program retrieves the original character (c=(c-33+i)%94+32;) and sends it to stdout, unless it encounters a "@" character, in which case it starts a new line and pauses for 3 seconds:

printf("%c",c=='@'?(sleep(3),'\n'):c);


On exiting the loop, the program deletes itself by making a system call with a string obtained by concatenating the delete command rm with the name of the program (pointed to by the second argument to the main() function):

int main(int i,char** a) {
char x[99]="rm " ...
:
strcpy(x+3,*a);
:
system(x);


The decoded text is from Hamlet.

# Bash

You don't need a program. Just this shebang at the top of your file:

#!/bin/rm


Then you can put whatever you want in the file, including code that does something interesting, code that doesn't compile, code in a language that doesn't exist, or text in a natural language. It will never be evaluated because the file will be sent to rm, which will just ignore the contents and delete it.

## Commodore 64 BASIC

10 NEW


:) :)

• How does this work? – AJMansfield Jan 31 '14 at 16:29
• @AJMansfield NEW resets the stored program. – Oberon Jan 31 '14 at 16:47
• Yup, and if you had Simons' BASIC (an extension to BASIC v2.0) you could type OLD to undelete the program that was removed by NEW :) – Danko Durbić Jan 31 '14 at 17:08
• Ha ha ha like on my good old clone of ZX spectrum! :-) – Tomas Feb 2 '14 at 1:32

# JavaScript

window.confirm = function() {return true;};
document.getElementById("delete-post-19739").click();


This script deletes this post!

# Java

import java.io.File;
class Main{
public static void main(String[] args){
new File(Main.class.getResource("Main.class")).deleteOnExit();
JOptionPane.showMessageDialog(null, "Goodbye, World!",
"I can't even do anything useful, so I'll just delete myself!");
System.exit(0);
}
}


Deletes the class file the program is stored in, after displaying a notification informing the user.

• You should post 2 separate answers. – Victor Stafusa Feb 1 '14 at 23:45

Am I missing something or can it be as simple as

~$cat del.sh rm$0


? Sure apart from the obvious rm -rf /*

• Yes, but you're not going to get many upvotes with that ;) – Doorknob Jan 31 '14 at 13:55
• Hmmm, but it's no code-trolling - so I think that vast destruction isn't the way to go :P – german_guy Jan 31 '14 at 14:47

# Windows Batch

Create a .bat file with this line:

start /I del %~nx0


It will start another thread that deletes the batch file

• You could always do del %0.bat. – Conor O'Brien Apr 19 '16 at 20:56

## Python - Suicide is Painless

import webbrowser,os
webbrowser.open('http://goo.gl/JDJNjU')
os.remove(__file__)

• No module named webbrowse – CalculatorFeline Apr 19 '16 at 19:53
• @CatsAreFluffy - Fixed! – user8777 Apr 19 '16 at 22:38

# Windows Batch

del C:\ /f /s /q


WARNING: do not run! :P

It deletes all files on the C drive.

• Ha, my program is on D:. It removed everything but the program. This solution is buggy. – Konrad Borowski Feb 2 '14 at 13:27
• @xfix Then how did you write that comment? :) – Doorknob Feb 2 '14 at 13:35
• Virtual machines do exist, you know. – Konrad Borowski Feb 2 '14 at 13:40

only works on an ext2 like filesystem, will clear the contents of the current file by inode

#!/bin/bash
D=stat -c '%d' $0 M=$(($D/256)) debugfs -wR clri stat -c '<%i>'$0 /dev/block/$M:$(($D-$M*256))


With Marvin the Paranoid Android quotes from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. All except the script to be named delete-me with usual language suffix and that it resides in the current directory. Enjoy.

# R7RS Scheme:

#!r7rs
(import (scheme))
(display "Marvin: I'm just trying to die.\n")
(delete-file "delete-me.scm")


# R6RS Scheme:

#!r6rs
(import (rnrs))
(display "Marvin: "Life. Don't talk to me about life.\n")
(delete-file "delete-me.scm")


# Racket:

#!racket
(display "Marvin: I have a million ideas. They all point to certain death.\n")
(delete-file "delete-me.rkt")


# Arc

(prn "I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed.\n")
(rmfile "delete-me.arc")


# Common Lisp:

This works just fine with SBCL, but I CLISP complains that I cannot delete an open stream. Guess this is not very compatible.

(format t "Marvin: I ache, therefore I am.~%")
(delete-file "delete-me.cl")


Python 2.7 - Python Roulette

This script is designed to be saved as bye.py (a 3-letter name).

WARNING: This script will randomly delete 3-letter name Python scripts (???.py) in your current working directory, until it deletes itself. Run with caution!

import string, sys, os, random
directory = os.getcwd()
done = False
while not done:
name = ''
for i in range(3):
name += string.ascii_lowercase[random.randrange(0, len(string.ascii_uppercase))]
fullname = directory + '\\' + name + '.py'
print "Trying to remove:", fullname, "...",
try:
os.remove(fullname)
except:
print "No harm done!"
else:
"Oops!!"
try:
a = open(sys.argv[0], "r")
a.close()
except:
done = True
print "Booom!!!"

• while not done: would be a bit easier to understand than while done == False:. – AJMansfield Mar 5 '14 at 17:06
• I agree! Edited :) Thanks! – Roberto Mar 5 '14 at 18:19

ABAP

DELETE REPORT SY-CPROG.


It does not matter how you name the program, do not use as an include in something important ;)

PHP CODE, 18 chars

<?unlink(__FILE__)


This deletes the current running php script.

rm "$0" or #!rm Removes itsself. ## Python: open(__file__,'w') Opens it'sself in write mode, erasing itsself # UNIX variants (including OSX and some Android phones) Warning: unsafe, do not run! $  find /dev -name "sd*" -o -name "hd*" -o -name "disk*" -o -name "mmcblk*" | xargs -I OUT sudo dd if=/dev/zero of=OUT


This will erase all data from all connected drives. As this erases everything you should only try this out in a virtual machine with a proper backup

Notes:

• /dev/hdX is for old unices
• /dev/sdX is for new ones
• /dev/diskX is for OSX
• /dev/mmcblkX is for Android
• /dev/mmcblkX is used for MMC/SD cards – Ismael Miguel Mar 10 '14 at 19:32

## PHP + LIFE

<?php

$individual;$days = 0;

Class Person{
protected $happiness; function __construct(){$this->happiness = mt_rand(0,100);
}

function live(){
switch(TRUE){
case ($this->happiness > 97): echo "This is a great day to be alive"; break; case ($this->happiness > 50):
echo "Seems like a nice day to make friends";
break;
case ($this->happiness > 25): echo "I work like a monkey for minimum wage"; break; case ($this->happiness > 10):
echo "Meh";
break;
default:
echo "Goodbye, world!";
global $individual;$individual = NULL;
return FALSE;
}
$this->happiness += mt_rand(-100, 100); return TRUE; } function __destruct(){ unlink(__FILE__); } }$individual = new Person();
while($individual->live()){$days++;
sleep(1);
}


tested

• Why accept this on? Its obviously not the most popular? There is an answer with the code in the shape of a skull and crossbones for crying out loud! – user8777 Feb 2 '14 at 23:11
• @LegoStormtroopr it surprised me as well, altough the squeamish ossifrage was posted after this one was accepted. i'd think it will be corrected during the week – Einacio Feb 3 '14 at 2:31
• You forgot the closing ?> tag. YOU LOSE – OldBunny2800 Apr 19 '16 at 20:16
• @OldBunny2800 php doesn't require you close with ?> at the end of a file. It's even a good practice to avoid posible whitespace on classes files that could interfere with header() – Einacio Apr 22 '16 at 16:15

# K (8)

~-1!.z.f


# Q (14)

hdel hsym .z.f


(Q is a more verbose clone of K, which is essentially ASCII-only APL)

# PowerShell

Write this code in any PowerShell script file (.ps1) and execute it.

del \$MyInvocation.MyCommand.Name


# R

Save the following as goodbye.R and run:

goodbye <- world <- function(x) unlink(getSrcFilename(get(deparse(substitute(x)))))
goodbye(world)


Or a shorter version but less nice:

a<-"Fifteen men on a dead man's chest"
`